Sugar, Sugar

• Finished painting the house! We are awesome painters.
• Uncle Gene likes to talk so we listened to him tell us about his new John Deere and his 12 other tractors. Also, we chatted about gas prices...he said that when he was little, his dad couldn't even put a dollar worth of gas in the car, because it only had a 10-gallon tank and gas was only $.10/gallon!
• Ice cream at Paw Paw's Sugar Bear, followed by X-Men with Carlee and my dad.

Hug You Like a Mountain (June 28)

• Lots of painting happened today. Lots of painting on high ladders happened for me.
• Barbara's mom told me that I give good hugs. I thank my camp people for that skill.
• I talked, ate and crafted with Mandy tonight. Talking with her makes me feel like my life makes sense and is okay, despite being totally not.
• If I knew exactly when I was leaving for NYC, I would have a countdown. Alas, my departure date is right in line with everything else in my life...unknown.

Girl on the Roof

• Today was Day 1 of Painting a House with Carlee and Kristin. It's a good thing that we are doing it for someone we know (Kristin's uncle) because we were quite the spectacle, attempting to power-wash the house and connect the hose to the power-washer and use the sprayer, while it was raining...I think anyone else would be having second thoughts about our abilities. Also, I got to be the one who climbed on the roof to wash the siding above the garage...it was scary!

• I'm drinking water out of a color-changing cup!

Annie's Other Song (June 26)

• I went to Annie's open house today and it was fabulous. Her parents are so hospitable to me, and Annie was way excited that she got to introduce me to her tall, red-headed cousin whom she wants me to marry.
• Experienced the yummy food (but strangely dark atmosphere) of P.F. Chang's with the Fluegemans, to celebrate Debbie's birthday.

Wandering Kind

• Between wandering around ER and MSU, we walked at least 7 miles today.
• When Julia, Josh, Brittani and I finished eating dinner at Harper's, the waitress came over with only one check and handed it to Julia. I said: "Julia, are you sure?" She said: "Raise your hand if you have a job...[she was the only one who raised her hand]...okay!"
• Josh informed us that he is skilled in the art of sweet-talking ketchup into doing what he wants it to do. I did not know this was a skill, let alone one that Josh Kleinhardt possessed.

Annabelle Red

• Dinner with ER girls and lots of playtime/kisses from Annabelle :)
• I'm the first non-family guest at Todd and Tiffany's.

I am incredibly grateful for my life.

A Gentle Reminder

This blog is serving the purpose of calming me about the future, helping me appreciate the present, and [especially] reiterating the fact that I'm in such a better place right now than I was this time last year. The people I'm with, the things I'm experiencing...mostly, the people I'm with. I am so grateful for that.

This Dress Kills

•  Annie told me that I was her role model, which made me feel so amazing.
• I got my Teaching Certificate in the mail! It's the most expensive piece of paper I've ever owned.

• I had to mail a some of my camp forms today. Anna and I pulled up to a stoplight and there was a mailbox at the bank on the corner...so I hopped out of the car, ran to the box and back, and got in the car before the light changed.
• We were serenaded by some hobos outside the library ("Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful").
• We found a great consignment shop in Canton and the women who own it are so much more pleasant than anyone who works at Plato's Closet. I got black, pin-striped dress pants that are LONG ENOUGH! And found an AMAZING dress that I will wear to future fancy engagements with my rich husband:

• We got free food at IKEA, part 2!

Human Connect to Human

It's amazing how much the connection we make can mean to us. (I cried, too.)

Everything at Once

• I got 2 prunes in my Sunsweet Ones package!
• Kristina is borrowing one of my formal dresses for her (high school-aged) Miss Farmington Pageant! If I didn't already know that I was skinny, that'd make me feel really good about my figure :)

Additional Thoughts From the Day

Today was Day 3 of FHS Mini-Camp #1. We got most of the costume stuff hashed out, finalized the guard numbers, worked lots of muscles and finished up basics.

Being at rehearsal today though brought up a lot of weird feelings and combinations of emotions. A lot of sadness. I miss Annie and Lauren. It sounds silly, but when Jenn couldn't be with me at rehearsals last year, it turned out okay because I always had those girlies to talk with during breaks or whatever (or even while Brad was talking sometimes...). I was also reminded a little of being in high school, as I thought about the kids who aren't in the group anymore, because of graduating or just not returning. The mindset that "last year was the best year, because of the people...this year won't be as great" is easy to fall into, especially for someone like me who really hates change. Which leads me to my next point of sadness: I'm going to miss all the people I got to be on staff with my first/second year of band camp with FHS. I think I might be the only one returning from those years (though I'm hoping rumors about other people coming back are true) this year. I know that the staff was awesome before I was there and will be fun this year too; I just miss that point in my life with those people. It also means I won't get to see Dawn this year...unless of course I roadtrip to Oklahoma.

Finally, today I took the first official steps in looking for a replacement for me for next season. I was kind of overcome by a sense of loss and fear. I'm so not ready to leave this job position group of people experience. My guard girls are amazing and help me feel like a whole, good person who is making a difference in someone's life. Mike is a fantastic leader, teacher and friend. The drumline actually likes me (a feat not easily accomplished by many guardies). I get to be a leader and also be taken care of (Rhonda and Tina take care of all the details that make my creative ideas real and the other parents make awesome food for tailgate). Leaving all of these things, even in search of other adventures, makes me scared. I'm scared that I won't find another guard job like it; that my leaving won't lead to anything better, even though it's not a full-time job or anything. Then I'm sad to think that if I don't find something awesome, and end up coming back to this area, that I probably won't be able to take the job back at a later time. I guess the one phone call I made today just recalled and magnified all of my fears that I've been trying to deflect all year. Sigh.

Fainting Spells

• One of my girls fainted at rehearsal today and it was one of the scariest things I've ever experienced.
• Homemade dinner and watching Jeopardy with Bethany :)
• Anna and I watched Pride & Prejudice, Part 2 (BBC version).

Date with IKEA

• Anna and I got a totally FREE meal at IKEA.
• And then we watched Pride & Prejudice, Part 1 (BBC version).

Girl in Ohio (June 19)

• I made it through Wauseon, OH with my transmission in tact! (This feat has not been accomplished by my Camry before.) Krystle and Justin know exactly how exciting this is :) 
• My saving account has made almost $8 in interest so far this year.

St. Stephen (June 18)

• Justin and I proved Jason wrong - McDonald's breakfast IS served until 11 am on weekends.
• Stephen Colbert: "Dreams can change...Whatever your dream is right now, if you don't acheive it, you haven't failed. And you're not some loser. And, just as importantly, if you do get your dream, you're not a winner...You cannot win your life."
• I had Chinese liquor. It is...interesting.

Asian Delight (June 17)

• I talked to this awesome Asian woman in JoAnn's today. I helped her pick out fabric and then she told me about her giant greenhouse and the vegetables that she grows. But the best thing, was what she said about birthdays. She was adopted and doesn't know her exact birthdate, so she just pretends every day is her birthday! When her husband asks her why she bought something, she says it was a birthday present for herself. Pretty sure this is my new mantra for my life.
• I'm watching "The One with Joey's Fridge" because my fridge is broken. It makes both the episode and my current refridgeration situation much funnier. (FRIDGE UPDATE: It's dead. Not really that funny anymore, even with Friends :( But Trudy and Carter are wonderful and I'm so grateful for them.)
• I experienced sparkly sidewalks, crazy teenagers and Xmen (I liked it a lot) in the bizarre mini-town in North Ridgeville, OH with Jason.

Cabin Essence (June 16)

• I grated cheese with a potato peeler.
• Anna, Cara and I kayaked on the lake and attempted to make a 3-person/3-kayak boat. It only kind of worked.