Monster Hospital (Jan 19)

• Being at the hospital with Krystle over the weekend brought some thoughts to the front of my mind: 
• I’ve never been in the hospital, other than for emergency stuff. 
• In fact, I haven’t been in the hospital since the car accident. 
• It was crazy seeing my incredibly strong best friend stuck in a bed, connected to an IV, because her body couldn’t handle what nature was throwing at her. 
• The chair that turned into a bed in her room was quite comfortable. 
• Unexpected perk – got to visit Katie, John and Charlie and finally see their house! Kyle came over too, because he lives right up the street, and it was so fun to just hang out with all of them. I love their little house and just seeing what they do from day to day. I also LOVE watching John with Charlie! He is so caring and loving but also very chill, like it’s just the most natural thing for him to feed and diaper and play with Charlie – which is how it should be :) 
• I got to see Kyle’s house too! It’s really nice – he’s so grown up! 
• Confession: I love taking care of people’s kids, especially children of my friends. But I HATE taking care of those kids in front of them. I know that I am a competent caregiver, but in front of a child’s parents, I am very self-conscious. What if I do things differently than they do/would and they realize that they can’t trust me? What if I do something wrong? I also don’t want to seem like I know best – more so than they do - when I continue holding their crying baby, trying my own ways to settle him or her down. And I don’t want them to think that I think of myself as a caregiver first, such that I will take care of the child over hanging out or that I see them just to see their child/children. I think that explanation makes sense…